What would our furry little ones tell us if they could talk? A dog / man dictionary would be really useful, wouldn’t it? We can finally understand what some words and human situations mean to the dog.
Ah if dog could speak! He would surely tell us to stop caressing the neighbor’s poodle, or maybe they would tell us the secrets of their friends / enemy cats, or they would complain about the new brand of food or the medicine they have to take. But unfortunately up to now it was not possible to have a real dialogue with our dogs. But finally, thanks to a fantastic, ironic and semi-serious dog / man dictionary we will be able to understand what our four-legged friends want to tell us!
The dog / man dictionary
love: strong affection, given for free and without restrictions. Show love by wagging its tail and looking the human in the eyes. Love is usually paid for with a pat on the head and a caress. If the human kisses the dog, the dog is forced to return the kiss.
Bathroom: a punishment for rolling in the grass. Start with a first part of hot water which is not bad, and the part with the shampoo is also interesting, but we don’t really like rinsing. To overcome this terrible torture, the dog must shake, shake, shake, to make sure that in addition to rinsing he / she also rinses the ceiling, the walls, the floor, and the human.
Bicycles: two-wheeled machines for the exercise of humans. For maximum aerobic efficiency, dogs must hide behind a bush and pop out suddenly, bark loudly, and run together with the bicycle; the person then stumbles and falls into the bushes. The dogs come home happy.
Garbage can: a game for dogs full of paper, packs of old snacks, and papers. When you are bored, turn it upside down and spread all the waste around the house.
taps: the best way to get the attention of our humans, especially when they are sipping a hot cup of coffee or tea. As a rule, use the upper part of your head to pat your arms, wrists, or hands. Then use the sad puppy eyes and shake the tail, to avoid being scolded.
Leash: a strip that attaches to the collar, e which allows the dog to take his human for a walk in the neighborhood.
Dog bed: any soft and clean surface. Examples: the white blanket in the guest room, the sofa, pulling the coat over the floor and lying on it. It is rarely the dog pillow.
Dustbin: a container that neighbors put out to test canine naivety. Dogs must then stand upright on their hind legs, and push the lid with their nose until it is removed. If you do it right, you will have a reward in leftover food.
drool: what should be done when the human has food and the dog does not. To do this, the dog must get as close to the human as possible, have a sad look and drop saliva on the floor, or better yet on the owner. Always learn to use puppy eyes.
Deafness: This is a selective disease that affects dogs when their humans want them to do something, but the four-legged would prefer to do something else. Symptoms include staring at the person with a lost look, then running away in the opposite direction, or lying on the ground.
pushed: a maneuver to be used as a last resort when the taps (see above) do not attract the attention required. The person will usually lose their balance and drop whatever they are holding. Very effective during human holidays or dinners. Dogs must stand behind humans, and hit them hard with the nose, then step back and wag their tail, keeping eye contact.
A good dog / man dictionary, isn’t it? From now you can read between the lines of what our dog thinks, and we hope that your cohabitation is full of complicity and affection!